


Forgive Me Father For I Have Sinned

by neytah



Category: Reign (TV)
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Character Study, F/F, Internalized Homophobia, Lesbian Character, Masturbation, Roman Catholicism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-23
Updated: 2014-03-23
Packaged: 2018-01-16 16:29:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 668
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1354063
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neytah/pseuds/neytah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stealing isn't Aylee's only secret.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Forgive Me Father For I Have Sinned

Stealing isn't Aylee's only secret. There's a deeper, darker secret, hiding deep in the pit of shame inside her. It eats at her, everyday from the inside.

Aylee loves the girls. She loves being with Mary and Kenna and Greer and Lola. She loves hearing their stories, their thoughts, their laughs, she loves being a part of their little group.

But she also _loves_ them. She loves the curves of Mary's body as they help her dress. She loves sweet, innocent Greer, and wondering what it'd be like to kiss those rosy lips. She loves Lola, woth her billowing brown hair and plump breasts perfectly filling out her dress. She loves Kenna, whom flaunts her sexuality proudly, her dresses always accentuating her curves, making Aylee's stomach twist upon the sight of her.

She hates feeling these things. She hates not being able to control it, wishes she could fawn over the noblemen of the court instead of eyeing up her friends like a creepy old geezer. So she keeps her mouth shut, her feelings locked away deep inside.

One day, the ladies go out for a picnic on the lake, enjoying the french outdoors. They talk of many things, of dresses and jewelry and braiding hair. And boys.

Mary asks about her first kiss. Aylee spouts some made up story of her and a nobleboy back in Scotland. She's gotten quite good at it over the years, lying about boys. Truth is, she's never kissed a boy.

Several years ago, there was a girl. Beautiful, for a serving girl. Her name was Stella. She was Aylee's handmaiden, her housekeeper, and her friend. And a sinner, as is Aylee. Aylee still remembers Stella's lips soft against hers, the sound of her laugh and the feel of her breasts. Back in Scotland, she's probably forgotten of Aylee.

Then it's Kenna's turn. Not her first, but best kiss.

She talks of some unnamed man, skilled, not foolish like boys. "Either you find yourself a man or take care of your needs yourself." Kenna says.

The girls errupt into giggles at Kenna's brash statement. But her words stick with Aylee, a whisper lurking in the corners of her mind. It stews inside her, bringing up thoughts she is ashamed to have.

It takes some wine, alone in her room, to drown out her shame. Intoxicated, she is able to think freely, of red lips and supple breasts and ivory skin. She thinks back to what Kenna said, with the cute smirk on her face. When Aylee reaces down between her legs, it's unlike anything she's ever felt before. What brings her to completion is the thought of Kenna, hair ruffled, cheeks flushed, touching herself as Aylee is.

The shame doesn't start until the morning, when she realizes what she's done. She goes to the chapel and prays and prays, prays for forgivness. She can't look Kenna is the eye for weeks. She limits her wine intake. She beings to flirt with one of the noblemen, the son of the ambassador from Normandy. He is kind, but the thought of kissing him makes Aylee gag. She prays and prays to love him, and to end her sacreligious thoughts.

But still she dreams of kissing Lola, or of Mary moaning beneath her, or of Kenna, and her expert fingers inside Aylee. She always wakes with a wetness between her legs and shame in her gut. It's a curse.

As she stumbles down the hallways, air caught in her throat and Kenna's tea in her hand, she can't help but think it's her punishment. It's surely a messenger of God that pushes her over the railing.

She lies on the floor, blood pooling around her, the girls crying.With her is Mary, with her porcelean skin and maroon lips, her hazel eyes dripping tears. She's looks like an angel. She's beautiful.

_Forgive me Father for I have sinned_   
_Forgive me Father for I have sinned_   
_Forgive me Father_

_Forgive me_

  
               _Forgive me_  


_Forgive me_

 

_please_


End file.
